355 memories (2007)

When my father died when I was eleven, I erased my life up to that point from my mind. I didn’t want to remember. However, old photographs, diaries and other objects reminded me of the things I had forgotten and should remember. Forgotten things do not disappear in forgetting – the presence of the forgotten feels strong, but it is impossible to grasp.

My photographs are not recollections, but rather images of forgetting – memories I am unable to reach. 355 Memories is an attempt to reach the elusive memories behind the images. My intention was to write down everything I remember from my childhood. The task proved to be difficult: memories kept popping up here and there, and recent events surfaced alongside my childhood memories. 

In this work, I ponder whether memories can be controlled and whether they have any order. What is the relationship between images and words? Can photographs really bring back memories, or are the words that we relate to them more important? Can a memory be mistaken? Can a life that has been lived be restructured?

355 Memories was first shown as a text installation at Photographic Gallery Hippolyte in Helsinki in 2007 in my solo exhibition To remember. The text was later published together with photographs in the book 355 Memories (2008). The installation has since been shown at École nationale supérieure des Beaux-Arts in Paris (2008), Palais des Beaux-Arts in Lille (2009) and Kunsthalle Helsinki (2009). The work is part of the collection of HAM Helsinki Art Museum.